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If Your Child Is Resisting Going To Practice

Written by Jordan Snider | Dec 22, 2014 8:00:00 AM

If your child is resisting going to practice, get to the root of the issue. Instead of allowing him to quit, find out what the cause is and ask a few questions that may turn his thinking around.

“But, I don’t want to go to practice, Mommy!” If your child has had a sudden change of heart when it comes to sports, helping your child to separate a temporary case of the ‘lazies’ from a desire for change takes patience and some serious discussion.

At different phases, children will have various reasons for not wanting to practice. These may range from a 5-year-old being fearful that he’ll make a mistake or “fail” to an 11-year-old who would rather stay home and play video games. While some children have legitimate reasons, others simply don’t. Before you give in and let your child skip practice or quit, have a discussion. Sometimes saying a simple, “Why don’t you want to go?” will get you nothing more than, “Because” or, “I don’t know.” Instead of stopping there, ask a few pointed questions that get to the heart of the matter. Helping your child figure out their love for the sport can boost your young athlete’s sporting spirit!

Try a conversation starter to get your child talking:

  • Is there something that worries you about playing the sport? If so, what is it?
  • Did one of the other kids on the team say something that wasn’t nice to you?
  • Are you nervous about having other people watch you while you’re on the field?
  • Are you getting a chance to play? Is the coach asking you to sit out during practice games or the actual games?

Older children, tweens, and teens may have more social reasons for wanting to skip out on practice. To better understand if this is the case, ask:

  • Are you saying that you don’t want to go because your other friends have plans to go out?
  • What do you feel like you’ll miss if you’re at practice?
  • Are your friends influencing your decision?

Discuss the answer, and let your child know that he needs to make his own decisions based on his own feelings. That said, don’t allow him to let fear or worry stand in his way. If he’s concerned that practice will be too challenging or that he won’t be as ‘good’ as the other players, explain that it’s the effort that counts. Talk about what the word “practice” means. Remind your child that practice is a time when he gets to train, learn, and build skills. If he’s concerned about missing social engagements, turn the discussion to a more work-life balance focus.